JesseCapelli.com

[Cole Blacke]

An American soldier, serving in World War II, had just returned from several weeks of intense action on the German front lines. He had finally been granted R&R, and was on a train bound for London. The train was very crowded, so the soldier walked the length of the train, looking for an empty seat. The only unoccupied seat was directly adjacent to a well-dressed elderly woman, and was being used by her little dog.
The war-weary soldier asked, "Please, ma'am, may I sit in that seat?"
The old woman,with an air of superiority, looked down her nose at the soldier, sniffed, and said, "You Americans. You are such a rude class of people. Can't you see my Little Fife is using that seat?" The soldier walked away, disheartened, but still determined to find a place to rest. However, after another trip down to the end of the train, he again found himself facing the elderly woman with the dog. Again he asked, "Please, lady, may I sit there? I'm very tired." Instead, the rude old woman wrinkled her nose and snorted, "You Americans! Not only are you rude, but you are also ignorant. Imagine!" Without hesitation, or saying a word, the soldier leaned over, picked up the little dog, tossed it out the window of the train, and sat down in the empty seat. The woman shrieked and wailed, and demanded that someone defend her and chastise the soldier. An English gentleman, who had been observing the situation from across the aisle, interjected,"You know, sir, you Americans do seem to have a penchant for doing the wrong thing. You eat holding the fork in the wrong hand, drive your autos on the wrong side of the road, and now, sir,........you've thrown the wrong bitch out the window."

[Tadelesh]

Though.. eat with the fork in the wrong hand?
_________________
Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[Cole Blacke]

Excellent point. I believe that it's something of "proper" etiquette, not necessarily what is most accepted....

[Lidia_Apricot]

Lol. I didn't get the joke until I've read the last sentence.

Great Joke, Mr. Blacke! Where on earth did you come up with such funny jokes....Do you have a files of jokes that you kept to yourself, lol.

[Drofgod969]

i don't think she could have fitted in the window though
_________________
yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend.

[Cole Blacke]

[Lidia_Apricot]

[Cole Blacke]

(*Facepalm*) I should have seen that one coming....

[Tadelesh]

Speaking of WD-40, that reminds me of something I once heard: you only need two things in life - WD-40 and superglue. If it's meant to move and it doesn't, WD-40; if it's not meant to move and it does, superglue.
_________________
Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[saphron]

tad, i'm sorry but that made no sense.
_________________
why must we fight who we really are?

[Ashton Gray]

You spray WD-40 on something that should move but does'nt, like a door hinge that creaks and slows the door from opening and closing. You apply superglue to something that should remain stationary but keeps moving, like the limbs of a model that won't stay in the position you place it in. Does that help?
_________________
Silentium est aurum

[Drofgod969]

ya, but it kills the joke behind it.
_________________
yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend.

[Bestile1]

i heard it as wd-40 and duct tape

[Tadelesh]

Hehe, duct tape reminds me of another thing..

Silence is golden. Duct tape is silver.
_________________
Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[Drofgod969]

You got it backwards Tadelesh.

Duct tape is silver. Silence is golden.
_________________
yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend.

[Tadelesh]

Meh. Does it really matter which way round it's said?
_________________
Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[Cole Blacke]

Well, it looks like I'll have to settle this.....

[Ashton Gray]

Game, set and match to Cole Blacke.
_________________
Silentium est aurum

[Drofgod969]

if i had a pic. it showed a stick figure with duck tape on its mouth.
It sayed "Duck tape is silver. Silence is golden." man do i wish i bought that shirt now... That is how i learned the saying.
_________________
yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend.

[Tadelesh]

That picture Cole posted is where I first saw it.

Personally, I don't think it really matters which way round you say it. It's personal preference, really.
_________________
Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[skybourne87]

awsome