JesseCapelli.com

[Axelord58]

I was gonna wait til tomorrow to post a new one but this one i couldn't wait for

In a city park stood two statues, one female and the other male. These two statues faced each other for many years. Early one morning an angel appeared before the statues and said, “Since the two of you have been exemplary statues and have brought enjoyment to many people, I am giving you your greatest wish. I hereby give you the gift of life. You have 30 minutes to do whatever you desire.” And with that command, the statues came to life.

The two statues smiled at each other, ran toward some nearby woods and dove behind a couple of bushes. The angel smiled to himself as he listened to the two statues giggling, bushes rustling and twigs snapping.

After 15 minutes, the two statues emerged from the bushes, satisfied and smiling. Puzzled, the angel looked at his watch and asked the statues, “You still have 15 minutes. Would you like to continue?”

The male statue looked at the female and asked, “Do you want to do it again?”

Smiling, the female statue said, “Sure. But this time YOU hold the pigeon down and I’LL shit on it’s head!”
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"If it ain't broke, just wait awhile. Because it will be.

[Drofgod969]

payback is a @#$%.
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yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend.

[Tadelesh]

Revenge is a dish best served.. um.. well, that's not cold, is it?
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Wow, sarcasm! That's original.

[Ashton Gray]

Coming from a statue, who knows?
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Silentium est aurum

[Ronald]

that was a shitty joke. lol.
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"Every exit is an entrance somewhere else." -Tom Stoppard

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[Tadelesh]

[Ashton Gray]

I was wondering who would use that pun.
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Silentium est aurum

[skybourne87]

lol nice