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Feingo Ferinton
Rank: Veteran
Joined: 09 Aug 2008
Posts: 664
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 Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 6:02 pm Post subject: JOKE: Before Bed |
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A man and his wife are laying in bed together in the early hours of the night. The woman has already dozed off, and the man is reading. Then, the man reaches over between his wifes legs and fingers her. She come out of her sleep, looks at him and gives him a coy smile before asking, "You want some?"
The man shakes his head while keeping his eyes on his book. "No hun, I just needed to wet my finger to turn the page."
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Tadelesh
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 31 Jul 2008
Posts: 1578
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| Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 6:04 pm Post subject: |
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 Don't know why he didn't just wet it in his mouth like everyone else.
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Ashton Gray
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Joined: 15 Feb 2007
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| Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 7:19 pm Post subject: |
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That one's a bit disgusting, in my opinion. 
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Lidia_Apricot
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Joined: 08 Oct 2008
Posts: 3273
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| Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 8:04 pm Post subject: |
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What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*
Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD |
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Cole Blacke
Rank: Senior Member
Joined: 21 Oct 2008
Posts: 289
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| Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 9:08 pm Post subject: |
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| I doubt they occupied the same bed for much longer......... |
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Drofgod969
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 08 Sep 2008
Posts: 3428
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| Posted: Sat Nov 08, 2008 9:10 pm Post subject: |
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that is all i can do right now and say
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yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
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Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend. |
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Tearlach
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 04 Oct 2008
Posts: 2914
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| Posted: Mon Nov 10, 2008 1:27 am Post subject: |
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| Lidia_Apricot wrote: | What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*
Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD |
No can do. That stuff is used for the book's binding as it is. But may be t'is a salty sea tale! Moby Dick perhaps? 
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Cole Blacke
Rank: Senior Member
Joined: 21 Oct 2008
Posts: 289
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| Posted: Mon Nov 10, 2008 4:46 pm Post subject: |
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| (*stares at book in hands*).......May I ask why you had to do that? |
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Tearlach
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Joined: 04 Oct 2008
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Feingo Ferinton
Rank: Veteran
Joined: 09 Aug 2008
Posts: 664
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| Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 10:12 am Post subject: |
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Well then, I suppose everyone is just dieing to know how the mans wife get back at him, so here it is. 
The next night, the woman is sitting in bed, reading a book of her own while her husband showers. Five minutes later, her husband walks out with a towel around his waiste and walks over to the mirror. He then drops the towel and proceeds to admire his naked body. He turns to his wife and says. "Look honey, 200 pounds of pure dynamite."
The wife looks up from her book and responds, "Fuckin' shame there's only a one-inch fuse."
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Feingo's story:
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Tadelesh
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 31 Jul 2008
Posts: 1578
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| Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 11:11 am Post subject: |
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Serves him right.
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Drofgod969
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 08 Sep 2008
Posts: 3428
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| Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 11:54 am Post subject: |
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 ouch...
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yesterday is history, tomorrow is a mystery, but today is a gift. that's why it is called the present.
quoted by master Oogway off kong fu panda
Some weep, some cry, some make couches fly. - Katmir
Let me stand behind you in times of peace, let me stand infront of you in times of war, let me stand beside you as a equall, as a friend. |
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Cole Blacke
Rank: Senior Member
Joined: 21 Oct 2008
Posts: 289
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| Posted: Tue Nov 11, 2008 3:54 pm Post subject: |
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| (*standing ovation*) BRAVO. |
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skybourne87
Rank: Rookie
Joined: 20 Jun 2009
Posts: 92
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| Posted: Sun Jul 12, 2009 2:15 am Post subject: |
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| lol |
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Cassandre
Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 31 May 2009
Posts: 1214
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| Posted: Thu Jul 23, 2009 4:00 am Post subject: |
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| Tearlach wrote: | | Lidia_Apricot wrote: | What!? He must have a very dry mouth or do not have enough saliva to turn the page and use his wife's......yeah....If I were her, I'll push him out of the bed and make sure he stays there -___-#. *grabs a bat*
Edit: And maybe, I'll say to him: "Hey! When you are ready to turn the next page, just jerk off!" XD |
No can do. That stuff is used for the book's binding as it is. But may be t'is a salty sea tale! Moby Dick perhaps? |
My sister and I have nothing to do, and she's visiting my villa (duh) and so we were just going through the jokes, and she saw that. I looked at he, and she was just staring at the door to my office, which has a bunch of books in it, and she was saying, over and over, "Must not lick books. Must not lick books."
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Rune174
Royal Member of BonBon
Joined: 29 May 2009
Posts: 6010
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| Posted: Tue Jul 28, 2009 5:45 pm Post subject: |
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heh, I feel sory for the guy if the woman decided to retaliate. A woman's vengeance is no laughing manner.
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Cassandre
Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 31 May 2009
Posts: 1214
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| Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 3:26 pm Post subject: |
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Hell hath no fury as a woman pissed.
I know its actually hell hath no fury as a woman scorned, but, hey, it works out both ways.
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xxthalexx
Rank: Super Veteran
Joined: 06 Oct 2008
Posts: 1159
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| Posted: Wed Jul 29, 2009 8:10 pm Post subject: |
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If your not going to put some positive feedback, dont post. saying the synonym for laugh out loud, simply tells me your just seeking to up your posts and nothing else. Great joke by the way, gave me a good laugh. But a bad move on his part
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henkcobra
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